Ask Russia and Canada
by 8NobodyKnows8
Summary: A small little chat with Russia and Canada...feel free to ask them ANYTHING  Rated M...because I have no idea what kind of questions Im gonna get    '
1. Chapter 1

Alrighty guys, 8NobodyKnows8 (NK) here! This idea was taken from AquaxFlame96 from her 'Ask America and England' series. I simply couldn't resist doing one for RusCan~ I'm honestly just doing this for fun, so please don't get all weird on me.

NK: So the basic idea is that you review asking ANY questions you want to ask Russia and Canada! And trust me, they WILL answer anything~

Canada: U-um, anything? Because I'm not sure I want to answer anything too em-

NK: Mattie, I have promised the fangirls anything…do not make me unleash their fury.

Canada: =_=' Yes ma'am…

Russia: Matvey, why did we agree to this again…?

NK: *turns to Ivan* Because I have Belarus on speed dial.

Russia: O_O…da.

NK: Okay, guys this is the basic format I want you to ask you're questions in (taken from AquaxFlame96):

Dear Ivan/Matthew (or whatever you want to call them I don't care)

Question/Comments

Username that you would like to use

And that's it! Tadaa~ So please review and ask your much needed question and they will be happy to answer them *glares at Russia and Canada* Kolkolkolkolkol~.


	2. Chapter 2

NK: Wow guys, we actually got quite a few questions~. We might as well get started then…*pulls out paper* You guys ready?

Canada: ^_^' Uh, s-sure…*isn't sure what to expect*

Russia: Da! *pulls Mattie closer*

NK: Okay then! First question is from Blind Squirrel and she asks: **'Dear Ivan and Matthew, a question for BOTH of you. What's the craziest place you've ever had a "romantic" umm.. outing...'**

Canada: 'Romantic outing'? Like a date? Well we haven't really gone on any really 'crazy' dates per say but-

Russia: *****giggles* I don't think that's what she means Matvey.

Canada: Hmm? Well what else wou- *blush* Oh…like…THAT?

Russia: *pats head* You're so cute. Well Blind Squirrel, if you mean the craziest place we've ever fucked, I think I can think of a few~

Canada: *gets even redder* Ivan I don't think-

Russia: But Matvey, we promised to answer every question they asked. Plus I don't want that insane fangirl to call _her._ *shudder*

Canada: …Okay. / Well I think one of the 'craziest' places would have to be…the back of Alfred's car?

Russia: Da! Or that one time he asked you to watch his house while he was on vacation with England…

NK: O,.O W-what happened then…?

R+C: We did it on every surface of the house.

NK: Hehehe, I'm writing that one down.

Canada: *facepalm* Oh dear…

Russia: *giggle*

NK: Alright! Next question! This one's from chocobnyluv and she- Oh dear god… She says this: **'Dear Ivan/Matthew, welllllllllllllllll chocobnyluv DEFINATELY has a few questions!~ 1.)Who wins more at hockey? (not Canada and Russia, but Ivan and Matthew) How do you normally react when you win/lose ? 2.)Canada... if you caught China coming on to Russia AND/OR Russia coming onto China (not that he ever would *glares at RussiaxChina fans*) what would you do? 3.)If you had a child what would you name him/her? 4.)Do you WANT a child in the imminent future? If so, how many? 5.)Are you scared of anything (besides Belarus, Russia)and how do you act when in the presence of that thing? (freak out, scream, cry, etc.) Just call me China!~3'**

Canada: O_O…I'm sensing an extreme fangirl.

Russia: I didn't know China was a fangirl!

NK: Hey! She's my friend, be nice!

Canada: That explains so much.

NK: *pout*

Russia: As for the first question, I think its rather obvious that I win more at hockey.

Canada: I think you mean _I _win more.

Russia: I do.

Canada: I do!

Kumajirou: *pops out of nowhere* What's-his-face!

*silence*

Russia: *****sigh* Fine. Matvey does tend to beat me more often, due to his speed and the fact that its his national sport. But its 60/40 average. Sometimes I let him win, because afterwards he gives great-

Canada: Okay, that's enough! Next question! Um…if China came onto Russia? *smiles sweetly* That's easy, I'd just tell Belarus and watch as she drives a knife through his face. And if that doesn't work I always have my hockey stick. *****borrows kolkolkol aura*

NK+R: O_O *back away slowly*

Canada: And if Russia left me for China…*has a sad look on his face*

Russia: Nyet. That would never happen. *wraps arm around Mattie*

Canada: Merci Ivan~

Russia: ^J^ Question 3…what _would_ we name our children Matvey?

NK: Can you guys even have kids? You're both guys.

Canada: Ever heard of the Mpreg Fairy?

NK: I do not wanna know.

Canada: As for names…I've always kinda liked Arthur…

Russia: You would name our child after that tea-loving crack-pot? He cant even remember your name half the time.

Canada: Well, yeah…but he means well and was always good to me when he remembered! And besides, would you rather me name our child Francis or Alfred?

Russia: …point taken.

Canada: Well what about you Ivan?

Russia: Anything but Dmitri. (blatant Giving In reference!)

Canada: I full heartedly agree.

NK: So are you two gonna have kids soon, or what?

Canada: / I-I don't think we're at that stage of the relationship right now…

Russia: *hugs him close* Maybe someday…?

Canada: *nods*

NK: Awwww~ yay! Anyway, last question! What are you guys scared of?

Canada: Well as for me, its being forgotten…not jut the occasional 'who are you', but actually disappearing from everyone's life. I'm scared no one will care if I'm gone…

Russia: I'd care. *kisses him lightly on the forehead*

Canada: ^/^ What about you?

Russia: I refuse to answer that question.

NK: Come on Vanya~ ya have to!

Russia: Nyet.

Canada: Please~!

Russia: Nyet.

Canada: *in sexy French voice* S'il te plait~

Russia: N-nyet…?

Canada: *whispers in Ivan's ear*

Russia: O/O Okay. My worst fear is being alone…Most of my life people have left me alone to fend for myself, and when they did stay with me, they always had their own selfish reasons for doing so. I hate the thought of being lonely…that's why I forced the Baltics to stay with me…There. I said it, now can we go now Matvey?

NK: Hmm? Where do you think you're going?

Russia: Well, Matvey said he would make it worth my while if I answered, so I'm holding him to that promise.

Canada: What, now?

Russia: Yes Matvey. NOW. *carries Mattie off to some unknown destination*

NK: But…we have a lot more questions to answer…*sigh* Oh well, thank you all for giving your questions and feel free to ask more! The ones that we didn't get to today shall be put in the next chapter, so please be patient! Thank you!


	3. Chapter 3

NK: Welcome back everyone! Round one of questioning got…interesting, but its just the beginning! We still have a whole slew of questions and much more entertaining answers (I hope) still to come! Lets get started, shall we? Our first question is from Dragonflamecrystal who asked: **'Why are hobbits and New Zealanders the most awesome people around? XD'**…*makes sure she reads that right* WHAT THE F*CK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

Canada: Your guess is as good as mine…?

Russia: New Zealand is a fine country I guess…though I do not see what's so intriguing about tiny people who live in hills.

Canada: *gasp* Ivan, how could you say that! Lord of the Rings was an (dare I say) awesome trilogy, and the hobbits accounted for 80% of that! Plus the whole thing was filmed in New Zealand, or so I hear, and that's good enough for me! It's a lovely place, I'd like to visit one day~

Russia: I still don't know why one would want to live in a hill.

Canada: *manly scoff* I don't expect you to understand. Although…*pfft* the mental image of you in a hobbit house _is_ rather laughable.

NK: *laughs*

Russia: *shoots NK a glare ('sorry Russia-sir'), then turns to Mattie* And why is that…?

Canada: *giggles a bit more* Well, ya know, 'cause you're so tall. You'd look kinda funny in a house that tiny.

Russia: …*sigh* What am I going to do with you?

Canada: *smiles sweetly* Nothing~

Russia: *grins* Or everything-

NK: -Okay! Next question! This next question comes from leap4joytx, who said: **'i would like to know how hot their sexy gets.' **Hun, I think we ALL want to know that. *turns to the two* Well~?

Canada: *blush* Well I think it kinda depends…

NK: On?

Russia: What exactly he's willing to do that night.

Canada: *blush X20* Y-yeah…

NK: Hehe, oh really? Well what about you Russia?

Russia: Me? I'm up for anything. It makes things more…entertaining, da?

NK: *imagines* Yes it does…O,.O

Russia: Personally, I like it when Matvey dresses up…he looks really nice in that Mountie uniform~. Or my old Soviet uniform…

Canada: Jesus Ivan, don't tell them everything!

Russia: What? I didn't say anything about the stilettos or booty shorts~

Canada: …I personally like to keep it _simple_. Toys are fun on occasion, but I find it much more romantic when we don't have to use them…

NK: Kinky and cute…how you two work in bed is a mystery. I love it. Anyway, next one! The next one is from Star-Tigress, who says this: **'Dear Ivan and Matthew, What does Belarus think of you two spending so much time together? Also, what do you each think of each other? Anyway, that's my question done, b'bye~ Love, Star-Tigress. P.S.- I shall hug you Matthew, I will find you, and I will hug you. You're too**

**adorable not to be hugged.'**

Canada: Aw, I appreciate the hugs, I feel loved~

Russia: *pulls Mattie closer* Mine. As for Belarus…she is…rather difficult to control…da.

Canada: *mumbling* Bitch tried to kill me several times…

Russia: What?

Canada: Nothing~ Anyway, how do we feel about each other? Well I love him, of course!

Russia: ^J^ Ya tebya lyublyu.

(*I love you…my computer doesn't like the Russian language)

NK: AHHHHH~! Fluff moment! *fangirl squeal*

R+C: O_O'

Canada: *takes paper and reads while NK spazes in a corner* N-next question…? From Artificial Starlight (NK: Le gasp! My idol!): **'Dear Ivan/Matthew, Who owns the North Pole? :D Artificial Starlight (Yeah, I asked a loaded question XD)' **Well we both do I guess…We both have land up there.

Russia: Nyet. You're wrong Matvey.

Canada: Huh? What do you mean?

Russia: Silly Matvey, soon the whole world will become one with me, so technically I own it.

NK: *rises from her corner* Nu-uh! You're _both_ wrong! Finland owns it! Get it? Because he's Santa!

Canada: *blank stare*

Russia: …I have the urge to bludgeon her.

Canada: Give her a break she's one of Al's…she can only be so intelligent.

NK: HEY!

Russia: *****takes paper*** **Next question~! From themagnificent ME: **'Dear Ivan, when did you first notice Matty and is his ass really as great as they say? themagnificent ME!' **

Canada: Why does that username sound like something Gilbert would use?

NK: Nah, it'd probably be closer to 'theAWESOMEme' or something…

Canada: Good point.

Russia: Hmm, when did I first notice him? When he busted through the door one day at a G8 meeting and started rambling on and apologizing because he was late. He looked really cute and had the submissive face of someone who might want to become one with Mother Russia, so I sat on him and we've been friends ever since. Now, thankfully, more than that~. As for his ass…it was practically _made_ for tempting men, so yes, it is as great as they say. But its still mine.

Canada: *facepalm* I don't know whether to be flattered or be smacking you upside the head right now…

NK: Well while you sort that out…That's all the time we have for today! Thank you for all your wonderful questions and we'll be sure to get to more soon! Till next time~ 


	4. Chapter 4

NK: We're baaack~! The questions just keep coming in and they keep on getting dirtier and dirtier…and dirtier…O_O Anyway! These next ones are rather family safe, for now that is. We should probably just get right to it! So question #1 is from avianlover, who asked this question: **'Dear Ivan, Thoughts on PruCan?( Other than how it doesn't make much sense...), Dear Matthew, Your thoughts on the idea of tattoo-ing Kumajiro(your polar bear)'s name somewhere on you so you never forget his name? ~Avianlover xD' **So guys, what of it?

Russia: Avianlover, you wish to know my thoughts on PruCan? *chuckle* Lets just put it this way, if he touches Mavtey, his '5 meters' will find a new home in a jar on my desk. *cue ominous aura*

Canada: =_=' Yeah, 'Prussia' is not a word to be uttered in our household…he gets like this. Hmm…tattooing Kumakichi's name on me? Well, I've never really liked the idea of tattoos to begin with…n-not that I'm opposed to tattoos or anything! Its just something I've never considered doing myself.

Russia: That's good. I like your body the way it is now.

Canada: /w/

NK: *coughcough* Yeah, we all do…

Russia: *glare*

Canada: A-anyway, knowing me, I'd end up getting the wrong name tattooed to me anyway and then it would be stuck on me forever…that would be disastrous.

NK: Haha, sadly I could see that happening. Next question! This one's a long one. Thing2BK asked: **'Dear Ivan and Matthew, I've got a few questions, hope you're ready~! 1) Just how 'French' can Mattie get? 2) Besides hockey, how do you usually spend time together? 3) What's your biggest pet peeve about each other? 4) Could you give NK a big hug for me for doing this? Thing2BK' **Aw! I get hug! This person is my new best friend! Thanks~

Canada: Haha, well she _did _request it. *hugs NK*

NK: *le gasp* Yay~ *hugs back*

Russia: My turn~ *hugs both of them*

NK: Dreams _do _come true~!

Russia: Time to start answering the questions. 'Mattie' *shudder* can be very French when he wants to be. He especially gets that way when he's drunk. Though he's very different than France when he's in a French mood. He's much less obnoxious.

Canada: *national pride* I'm not channeling my inner 'France', I'm channeling my inner 'Quebec'!

NK+R: Whatever you say.

Canada: *grumble* Next question. Well, because we're nations we get very little free time, so most of it is spent at home. Ivan will come over and stay for maybe a week at a time, likewise I sometimes go over to his house for awhile, and when that happens mostly we just…hang out.

Russia: Among other things~…

Canada: Yeah…I honestly enjoy when Ivan cooks for me. Sometimes he'll make something new, and half the time I cant pronounce it, but it tastes really good! That and sometimes I make him wear an apron…*giggle*

Russia: Da…I like it when Matvey reads to me. He'll just curl up on the couch do that when there's a storm outside. I like listening to his voice, its oddly calming.

Canada: Yeah excluding hockey, our daily life is actually pretty peaceful.

NK: Aw~. What about your pet peeves?

R+C: He's way too stubborn.

Canada: *raises eyebrow* _I'm_ stubborn? That's like the pot calling the kettle black!

Russia: Likewise.

Canada: You are so infuriating sometimes.

Russia: Da, as are you.

NK: …Okay then~! Moving on! Next question is from Chivy, who asked: **'So what are your wedding plans? Do they contain Matthew in a white dress with red and lacy stilettos? Previous crushes of you both? and do you guys have magical powers? (or at least, is Russia really a demon?)'**

Canada: This one's really odd. W-we don't really know if we're getting married or not yet…We just started dating a few months ago.

Russia: Aw, does Matvey not want to marry me?

Canada: No I do! I just…wait, you want to get married?

Russia: *wraps arms around Mattie's waist and whispers in his ear* In the words of my sister: Marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me~…

Canada: *blush* Oui.

*cue epic make out scene* (I really wish this was a legit fic, this would be so fun to narrate!)

NK: C-cute!

Russia: There. _Now_ we can talk about wedding plans!

Canada: I'm not wearing a dress.

Russia: But-

Canada: Non. I am _not_ wearing a dress.

Russia: Please?

Canada: Ivan, the day you let me top, is the day I wear a dress to our wedding.

Russia: *thinks about it* …Okay.

Canada: Wait, WHAT?

Russia: I said okay. I'll let you top. _Once. _

Canada: B-but, I-

Russia: So we're agreed. You're wearing a dress!

Canada: Fuck…

NK: What about the red stilettos?

Russia: We'll save those for the honeymoon.

NK: I accept. So now to make things awkward. Previous crushes, spill it!

Canada: *sigh* Well, once upon a time I did actually like Prussia…but that was before I had actually met him and knew what he was like. Hmm, lets see, Japan was my _first_. Don't ask how that happened. Oh and I used to have a crush on Ukraine, and I once had a brief affair with Romano.

NK: That is possibly the most random collection of people I have ever heard.

Russia: Romano…Matvey, the others made sense but…Romano?

Canada: I was young, he was hot and Italian, what can I say?

Russia: He officially goes on my death list now.

Canada: *facepalm* Great.

NK: *turns to Russia* And you?

Russia: I've had many lovers, but not many 'crushes'. I'll admit that when I was young I had a crush on Lithuania, and I thought Latvia was rather cute. England proposed a bit a challenge, which intrigued me a bit. Other than that, I've never really _liked_ anyone.

NK: Ooo! What about magical powers?

Canada: I guess invisibility, if that's considered a 'magical' power. And…does talking to polar bears count? *shrug*

Russia: I'm fairly good at curses, and I believe England once referred to General Winter as 'magical'.

NK: Yeah but, are you a demon?

Russia: *gives a mock bow* 4Da, moi gospodin4.

(*'Yes, my lord' (don't judge me!) Again, my computer hates Russian)

NK: YES!

Canada: *rolls eyes* Really now?

Russia: Da~ Next question!

NK: Actually, that's all the time we have for today! Thank you all for participating and please send me more questions, so that I may torture these poor souls! Bye~!


	5. Chapter 5

NK: Alrighty~! We're back for more, and we better get started.

Canada: *sigh* Just when I think we've made progress, I look back and there's like 80 more questions…TT_TT

NK: You're such a drama queen. I'm having fun~!

Russia: Da, _you_ are…Though it may be worth it to see Matvey like this.

NK: See? It's a win/win situation! Question #1, from zero434, is: **'does matties disfunctional family know about ur relationship? if belarus and U.S.A ever get together what would u do? russia how do u feel about prussia randomly bragging into canada's house demanding pancakes? rus how do u feel about canada's numerous international 'affairs'? can do u top or bottom?'**

Canada: Wow, right off the bat we get the difficult questions…Forgive me for answering your question with another one, but how exactly would we _hide_ our relationship? People may not notice me very often, but Al does have a tendency to bust into my house at random times which makes for very awkward situations, believe me.

Russia: That, and how could I pass up the opportunity to flaunt the fact that I am in possession of a beautiful and sexy Canadian?

NK: 'In possession'?

Canada: I will smack you…but thank you~.

Russia: You're welcome~. *looks at next question* If my sister dated…America? Well on the one hand that would get her off my back, but on the other hand…she'd be dating _that_. I honestly don't know what I would do…

Canada: I think he'd be torn between throwing a party and castrating my brother. Probably both…Ooo, run Al, run.

NK: Alright. What about Prussia randomly demanding pancakes?

Russia: I hope he likes the taste of lead pipes.

Canada: Oh come on Ivan. You know he's always welcome to come over. He may be annoying, but I do actually enjoy cooking for him.

Russia: So I take it you would be mad if cyanide mysteriously made its way into the pancake batter?

Canada: Taint my pancakes, and I will brake out my hockey stick.

NK: I say you unleash an army of beavers!

R+C: *'what the fuck' look*

NK: Fine, don't accept my ideas…

Russia: Moving right along…*takes paper and stares at Mattie* 'numerous international affairs'?

Canada: Hehe…what? You think you're the only one who gets around? I was raised by France after all.

Russia: Da, but…'numerous'?

Canada: Contrary to popular belief I _did_ have a sex life before I met you Ivan.

Russia: We will talk about this later. *sigh* 'Can you do top or bottom?' I assume they are referring to me. I top. That's really all there is to it. However…I'm letting Matvey top for _one_ night in order to get him into a dress at our wedding. I still don't know what to think of that.

Canada: *evil chuckle* Oh yeah, I've been thinking of a few ideas…you should be scared.

NK: Hehe, yup! So, on to question #2! DanceFireDance asked: **'Dear Matthew/Ivan, Hello! I suppose I've got a few questions, so here it goes~! Matty, what are your feelings about being paired with everyone in the entire series?(I kid you not. EVERYONE. I have seen you paired with TURKEY.) Ivan, why do you think that everyone is frightened by you? And, for the both of you, what's your favorite position? (for sexy times.) ~Fire' **Uh…how many positions could there be?

Russia: *grin* More than you know.

NK: My virgin self is slowly being scarred for life.

Canada: Oh well. Wait, I'm paired with EVERYONE (Turkey, really now)? I mean jeez, I have my fair share of fun…but I haven't been with _everyone…_I feel like whore now…

Russia: Don't worry, you're nothing like France.

Canada: Merci.

Russia: *innocently* As for me I have no possible idea why everyone is so afraid of me~.

Canada: Yeah, because lead pipes and psychotic breaks aren't scary at all...

Russia: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Canada: Of course you don't.

NK: I'm afraid to ask but, sex positions?

Canada: C-can we skip this one?

Russia: Nyet, its an easy question.

NK: S-so, what is it?

R+C: Missionary.

NK: Wow, how very…non-kinky of you.

Canada: Well I believe I said this earlier, but I like to keep things simple. For me it feels like the most intimate way to do things. It means more.

Russia: Da. It may be a bit of a fetish of mine, but its during sex that Matvey is most beautiful. I wouldn't miss that.

NK: Aw~…cute! S-so…next question! Question #3 is from dark-yokokitsune, who asked: **'Dear Ivan and Matthew, Would you ever do it during a meeting with everyone else in the room (ex places: in a chair, on the table, in Ivan's coat 3, etc...)? also how do you two feel about Mattie in short shorts or tight leather pants? dark_yokokitsune, aka yoko-chan' **

Canada: There's a lot of sex questions aren't there?

NK: They're fangirls…do you expect differently?

Canada: *sigh* Have sex with everyone in the room? No. Would we do it in a chair or on a table? Sure. 'In Ivan's coat'…?

Russia: I don't believe we've tried that one yet. We should…

Canada: That would be…interesting. =_='

Russia: How do I feel about Matvey in short shorts or tight leather pants…Both show off his nice ass, so I'm for them!

NK: Okay! Next one! Question #4 was from animegrl72 who asked: **'Most for Ivan but how do you feel about the other wearing your clothes? And just because I have to ask have either of you ever dressed up as Ivan Mountie and Red Army Mathew?'**

Russia: I personally like it when Matvey wears my clothing. Its really oversized and he looks adorable.

Canada: Yeah, I tend to lay claim to his scarf in bed.

Russia: Da, and I haven't dressed up as a Mountie, that's Matvey's job.

Canada: I like you in your Soviet uniform~…It's the hat.

NK: Yeah I want that hat too. But, not for those purposes…Anyway, that's all for today folks! Thank you guys for asking your questions, and please provide us with more! See ya~!


	6. Chapter 6

NK: Well, here we are again for another run at this! *Le sigh* So many questions, so little time…Lets get started! Question #1 is from xXMichiko-Russian-ReaperXx, who asked: 'Privyet~ I just wanted to know what kinds of foods have you both eaten off each other if any. I wrote a fic about that and need to know just how correct I am. Also, if you could sing to Matthew, what would you sing Ivan –this will be made into my next songfic too. With best regards~ Russia **or just michi** Songfic? Guys, the fate of good fanfiction rests in your hands, answer well! (a/n: Don't judge me for my choice of songzzzzz!)

Canada: Um…okay. W-well, I think maple syrup is a given…

Russia: Though, it gets rather sticky…there's vodka of course!

Canada: My sheets smelled like alcohol for a week, though. Hmm, what else?

Russia: Whipped cream, strawberries…

Canada: Chocolate!

Russia: Da. You know, the basics. As for a song…*thinking face*

Canada: Now that you mention it, I don't know that I've ever heard you sing.

NK: Somehow, I cant imagine Russia just randomly busting out into song.

Canada: Good point.

Russia: Well when I first met, or rather noticed, Matvey I always had this one song in my head.

NK: Which was?

Russia: 'Manta Rays' by Ludo.

Canada: Why that song?

Russia: The chorus reminded me of you, especially since we hadn't met yet.

Canada: ?

Russia: *sighs and begins singing* _'All I want~ is to know your name and whisper it in your ear, with your arms around my neck~ You've haunted me in colors I've never seen, I feel strange and unprotected, but I'm weightless like I'm falling on the moon~'_

NK: Oh my god…that was beautiful. I love that song.

Canada: *hugs Ivan* I love you…thank you.

Russia: Love you too. *slight blush* There, is another song I could do as well.

NK+C: ?

Russia: *mumbling*

NK: Didn't quite catch that.

Russia: *sighs and refuses to make eye contact* 'Enchanted' by Owl City.

Canada: Pfft! *laughs* Aw, Ivan that's so sweet!

NK: That's so cute~!…though I have to ask. Ludo and Owl City are American bands…wtf?

Russia: *still hugging Mattie* What can I say? Spying in America gets boring, there's not much else to do but listen to the radio.

NK: Lets hope Alfred didn't hear that…Anyway! Next one! Question #2 is from Ella Rayne, who asked: 'Okay, so here are my questions. (I have two) 1) To Matthieu: What is your favorite "toy" for Russia to use? 2) To Both: Have you ever had a menage a trois? And if so, with who?-Ella Rayne'

Canada: Favorite 'toy'…? Uhhhhhh…

Russia: Come now Matvey, be honest.

Canada: H-handcuffs and lead pipe…

NK: Whoa, two?

Canada: Well its kind of assumed, that if he uses the handcuffs he's using the lead pipe…*facepalm*

NK: Not kinky my ass…you like it rough Mattie.

Russia: Only on occasion~

NK: So…what about ménage à trois?

Canada: Are you kidding? Ivan's too possessive for that.

Russia: I don't like to share.

NK: Okay then…NEXT! Question #3 is from the epic awesome mii, (Prussia…?) who asked: 'Hi! Matthew: Is Alfred with Arthur? Do you do kinky stuff with maple syrup? Have you ever crossdressed? Ivan: Are u and Germany on good terms/ Are you and Canada friends with Prussia? Also, why don't u just put Belarus in a cage on Mt. Everse? Do you still hate Alfred and have you ever put embrassing photos of him on the internet? Adios and bye for now! From, the epic aweome mii :D' Damn that's a lot of questions…perfect! I like these…

Canada: Well, I'm up first…I-I guess. Alfred most definitely _wants_ to be with Arthur, but they're both too dense to realize their feelings. Plus it doesn't help that Al pisses Arthur off to no end, and intentionally at that. But I hope they get together soon!

Russia: Da, that would get him off our back…

Canada: Yeah…as for maple syrup, yes. Yes I do. I'm leaving it at that.

NK: And to our imaginations~

Canada: *rolls eyes* Anyway, no I have never crossdressed.

Russia: You will at our wedding!

Canada: Maple…don't remind me.

Russia: Aw, don't be sad, you'll look beautiful~. As for my questions, Germany and I are on good terms. I see him every time I try to visit Italy and at World Conferences and such. We are not good friends understandably, considering his obnoxious brother, but we get along fine. Speaking of Prussia, I am not friends with him, however (regrettably) Matvey is one of his closer friends. He new him before I did.

Canada: Which is rather frustrating considering we fought an entire World War together as allies.

Russia: …I…back to the questions! I could never put Belarus in a cage and leave her to freeze! I may be rather frightened by her, but she is still my sister, and therefore I do love her. Just, not as much as she loves me…Da, I do hate Alfred. Were he not Matvey's brother, I would have bashed his head in with a pipe long ago.

Canada: Don't do that. He may be annoying and self-centered, but he's still my brother.

Russia: *sigh* Da…

Canada: Do you even own embarrassing pictures of Al?

Russia: *evil grin* I might…

NK: It's a yes or no question Vanya. *totally wants those pictures*

Russia: Fine then. Da, I do. Though I'd rather not discuss how I got those pictures…I sold one to England once. He was in a maids outfit.

Canada: Mon Dieu, pourqoui?

Russia: I believe he received it from Japan…he does strange things when he's alone.

Canada: I don't wanna know why you were stalking my brother.

NK: I think its safer not to ask. Next one! Its from Rubyeyed10, who asked: 'Dear Matt, How do you feel about being technically older than Alfred? Do you get along better with the Nordics?(aka drinking buddies,ect.) Would you rather have the Nordics as a family or FrUk + US? Lastly, what do you think would have happened to you if you were raised by the Nordics longer? Ivan, Who would you rather have as in-laws, Nordics or *them*? This last one is a statement to both of you, My friend made a doujinshi of us if life were in anime/manga and we needed

parents for me cause I wanted some. Anyways I always admired Russia so I chose

you to be my father and since as soon as I get a passport and am out of

highschool, I plan to move to Canada (and I'm happy to say I'm leaving

America, sorry Al) so your my "mother" how do you feel about indirectly being

my parents?(Oddly enough I act like Ivan when I'm mad but any other time I'm

like Matt)' Holy sh-…have fun guys. (Lol, I want to leave the US and go to Canada for college as well~)

Canada: Finally! Someone who realizes I'm the older one! How do I feel about it…? Um, I don't know. Sometimes it makes me feel like I'm hanging around a child when I'm with Al, but other than that I don't really _feel_ older. If anything, I feel the same age as him.

NK: How are you twins if you're older?

Canada: I…really don't know. He did claim independence first, so I guess it's a trade off. As for the Nordics, I assume I get along with them fine. I mean, they're not exactly masters of personality (with the exception of Finland and Denmark of course), so I think they're okay with me. We've gone out drinking a few times, though I can honestly say I don't remember half of it. They're nice people though. I cant say I would _rather_ have them as a family than Papa, Arthur, and Al, the experience would have been completely different. Not necessarily better or worse, just different. I wouldn't be the country I am today, that's for sure.

NK: Come to think about it, you and Russia probably would have met way earlier than you did.

Canada: That's true, though my opinion probably would have been different of him. We might not have gotten together.

Russia: I do not want to think about that.

NK: Think about it this way, now you have a reason to be thankful for his insane family.

Russia: …

NK: Well I think that answers your question.

Russia: Da…Well Matvey, it seems we indirectly have a child.

Canada: Wow, already? I'm flattered you want to come over to Canada, let me be one of the first to say 'welcome'. *smile*

Russia: *grins* So you don't mind being the 'mother'?

Canada: Why, did you want to continue being 'Mother Russia'?

Russia: Touché.

NK: Welllllllllll~, that all for now! Please continue asking more questions guys! (And to all I haven't gotten to yet, I'm _trying_, there are a lot.) Thank you all for the support and your patience! Adieu~!


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